Many suffer from loneliness, others of having done a wrong choice. The lucky ones are not always those who deserve to be. For instance, the very women who sometimes were so attached to let the game of chance and destiny act naturally without any particular organization, come and complain of having a liar, coarse or even violent husband. Would they not have better care about giving for example more chance to the timid when it was time, against the sacrosaint principle of passivity ?
Some argue that the best way to find would be to stop searching, as if fate took a wicked pleasure to have plans contrary to our efforts. Should not such a proposition be seen as grounds for scandal rather than a reason to keep quiet and do nothing ? I would rather bet this observation is best explained by "who did not find is still searching" while those who neither seek nor find do not find a place in the statistics; moreover, it reflects the desperate lack of an effective searching method.
Some say : you have not met the right person yet. Answer: why do you want to deny to this more ideal encounter of the right people, the right to have occurred earlier ? Just because, well it's like this, uncontrollable like the weather ? Once again: are we supposed to live under the law of the jungle and of natural forces in all their cruelties, or inside a civilization ? that works to make human actions happen in a decent manner ?
Comparing the situation to a market, one can express the problem saying that transaction costs are currently considerable for some: even if there are people who can match, it is sometimes very difficult to meet and to declare up to exchange addresses for possible further meeting.
Formerly people got married young, which indeed was the
solution for a shorter life than today.
Today, while human nature and its speed of maturation
remains similar, and society has become much more
prosperous; should have, in principle, used this opportunity to let everyone
greater margins of freedom to satisfy their aspirations, it
in fact artificially subjected the young to a system of constraints and taboos making love
encounters more or less unthinkable and
impracticable. It did this through a school system dictating
as official priority of the lives of young people, especially those who
want to be "serious" and develop an intellectual life,
to invest heavily efforts of their youth in their studies.
Millions are spent by the society to defend the "right to
find jobs" for all, through an excessive school investment, whose content is
even sometimes absurd and contrary to true professional training
and intellectual development; but not
a penny is spent by anyone for their right to meet
love, despite the glaring structural parallelism between the two
problems. This goes up to filtering away dating sites from
academic computer networks, for fear that the young
might waste a few cents of the institutional bandwidth budget.
Yet the consequences are disastrous and finally extremely expensive, even if invisible from official statistics : depressions, efforts implemented by the individual to try to provoke opportunities for meetings potential in a hostile environment, which is sometimes a huge waste of human resources of the society.
The activity sector of marriage agencies and dating sites is very lucrative, anarchic and full of traps. Many people are shocked, but how? Some think: Ah, what perverse antisocial who are coming to these systems, unable (unworthy?) to find a partner by socialization and "normal" methods. Uh, which normal methods please? What socialization, if not this chain fabric of passive and isolated individuals except for mockery and disputes, by institutions that can only consider as normalcy the castration and to make impossible to find love, as something that should be forgotten behind other "priorities"? For in a world where love and dating stand for immoral, only the immoral people, by their freedom with respect to morality, finally have the right to love.
Others think: What a corrupted activity is the dating business with not really relevent services,
and full of swindles !
Of course, but would not that be rather the fault of the so-called good-willing people who have cowardly abandoned the singles to their fate and have not deigned to offer them any more useful service, more honest and efficient ? Is not there in this world any better way of thinking than dishonest greed for waking up to the true issues of sentimental miseries of millions of innocent people and for trying to imagine how to bring some minimally relevent methods to try to solve them ? A collateral damage of the dominant totalitarian pseudo-morality, is the regressive selective pressure that it puts on the human species against the genes of virtue and intelligence, those very qualities that this pseudo-morality pretended to promote.
A world in which such a vital right (article 16) (for those for whom it is vital) as the chance to meet potential love partners, and so perhaps one's future spouse, is passively left to the biased lottery of destiny, without implementing the least organizational aid effort in this direction, is not worthy to be called a civilization. As would not be a world that would see as unworthy of eating bananas, and would deny the right to, to those who are unable to climb the banana tree, or even to those that have been prevented from clibing the banana tree by any other artificially institutionalized circumstances.
Particularly outrageous is the fact of not helping the good (lovely) people who would most need it, that even sometimes would be ready to become widely useful to the world once unloaded the burden of this problem. Notably, timid men are especially disadvantaged, by lack of circumstances that would explicitly enable them to carry out the operations necessary to start a relationship without a risk of being looked through.
This problem of finding the soul sister is similar to that of finding jobs, as here is a
comparison. Namely, as a strictly private affair but whose
opportunities for achievement are subject to the presence of
adequate structures of society, particularly through the internet tool,
that a true civilization is responsible for seeing to establish
to try to respond as much as possible to all needs.
But with one fundamental difference: the more society becomes rich and prosperous, the more the painful activities (and also official concerns for them) must give way to those who are more fortunate. Comparing the situation to a market, the first problem is that transaction costs are considerable at least for some people: even if possible matches do exist, it is sometimes very difficult to meet and declare oneself and to manage exchanging addresses for possible later meeting. Thus, new efficient methods should be developed, assisted by technological tools. All this should be studied as a new research field, a new branch of economics, in a try to find out all the possibly useful details for the implementations of the dating methods available to the singles'search, to reduce the transaction costs and to make it generally easier to find love for all people, especially the good people and those who really need to find and would have otherwise troubles to; and so to match people in a way as good as possible.